Fun in Chult with Sael'Faen, Part 2

Dear Diary,

So they’re not mimes. I think that’s camouflage or something, because who would willingly approach a mime about anything? See a mime robbing a store, and you’re like, “I could try to stop him, but then I’d have to actually interact with a mime.” It’s basically the perfect cover.

You know who’s terrible at cover, by the way? Tormies. I swear, we’re walking down the street – a huge half-orc, a half-dragon, a guy half again as tall as me covered in weird markings, a girl with a sword that could cut me in half, and regular old me, and it’s Rof that’s all twitchy and nervous, drawing everyone’s attention as he gathers up all his fliers. I offered to help pass more out, too, but he said he has to check with his fellow priests first. That’s fine, but if it were me, I’d be doing everything I could to find those kids. I know what it’s like to be kidnapped, and it’s terrifying.

(but we killed those who harmed us…)

Yes. We always do. I mean, couldn’t we have just flayed one of the Last Laugh people until he spilled his guts? And then made him talk?

(I see what you did there.)

Maybe I’ll suggest that next time we see one of them.

Once we get to the temple of Torm, we meet a whole mess of Tormies, including Lord Alek Turcival, Lady Jenya Urikas, and others. Add them to Rofael, and you’ve got a bunch of names I needed to write down just to remember. Can’t they spell their names more simply? What’s wrong with the classic spellings, anyway? Like Sael’Faen Dyrranor. Just try misspelling that.

Alek and Jenya, upon seeing Rof returned safely, are both grateful, but the two high-ranking Tormtars soon set to arguing over the wisdom of the fliers. Alek believes they’re the best way to root out who’s behind the kidnappings. Lady Jenya basically calls him Tormtarded; the Last Laugh are far too powerful to provoke like that. Alek’s all like, “To hell with the consequences! Thirty people have disappeared, and now children!”

I have to say, I admire his spirit. If I were missing, I’d want someone like Alek busting down doors and busting in heads to find me. Especially if I was an orphan.

(which you are)

Which I am.

After a night of calm meditation in The Drunken Hippogriff (point of clarification – that’s the name of an inn), we set out on the town to learn more of what we may about the missing people and the Last Laugh. I made my way to the orphanage, and it’s there that I met Agytha, the adorable orphan girl. I instantly felt a connection – I think we may be kindred spirits. She opened up to me about what she saw, and even though the others have dismissed her recounting as mere nightmares, I’m deeply inclined to believe her. Before departing, I promised her not only that I’d find her friends, but that I’d keep her safe, too. It’s good to have a purpose here in Cauldron.


As we leave the orphanage, the Last Laugh members we were looking for all day find us. Isn’t that just as helpful as anything? They even gave us a choice – leave Cauldron, or face the consequences. I’d like to state for the record that I had a few followup questions to their proposal. Turns out Sar’Vol doesn’t do followup questions. Or questions in general. Or, you know, words…

(I believe this is my cue to take over?)

Be my guest. I’ll see you on the other side. Just try not to get too much blood in my hair this time. It’ll scare Agytha.



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